It's all 'Mer'can to me...

Yesterday, one of my Canadian friends made a reference to a touque. Naturally I knew exactly what she was talking about, because I consider my self an English speaking individual. Up until a few years ago that is....

One of the most shocking realizations that dawned on me upon moving to the US, was that all of a sudden I had to learn a new language! 'Mer'can! Don't get me wrong. I am all about expanding the mind, I simply wish that I had learned about this in a manner other than a series of awkward conversations with people that I was trying to make friends with...

It all started with a very innocent trip to the city. I live in the suburbs, and one night a few of us decided to get together in Center City Philadelphia for some fun. If any of you have ever gone to the city on Friday or Saturday night, you will know that parking is as rare and precious as a three carat ruby. And let me tell you, those are some rare and precious stones! A girl's gotta know her bling. SO, being brilliant as I am (no pun intended), of course I had a marvelous suggestion of parking in a parkade! "A what?!!" my friend's head whipped around so fast and hard I though it would sever.... needless to say no one's ever heard of a 'parkade' here...they call it a 'parking garage', which in my opinion just seems like too many words to describe something that you would obviously use for parking......

You can also forget about all the 'ou's in words like colour and flavour. And if you ever want to discuss the finer points of using you garburator to reduce waste and save the planet...save the oxygen and don't bother wasting your breath....here it is the 'garbage disposal'.

So, if you are still confused about why I brought up the touque, it's because here it is simply 'a winter hat'. How.....bland.

Well, the bad news is that if you are thinking of moving to the US, you will have to learn a new language, and sadly there is no "My 'Mer'can Coach' for your Nintendo DS. But, the good news is that now your have a perfect excuse to watch endless hours of 'New Jersey House Wives' and 'Gossip Girl'! It's the only way you'll ever get a chance to learn all the words! So, grab yourself a bag of ketchup chips (while you still can) and get to learnin'!

Hmmmm.....now that I think about this. What we need is an 'Mer'can translation app! Then the world will truly be complete!